Worth A Life

Daily Prompt: Take A Chance On Me

What’s the biggest chance you ever took? Did it work out well? Do tell!

Right after I read this prompt, a lot of things came into my mind. It’s on a free flow!

… but I am only going to tell you this one big thing that change the course of my life. It is a very big gamble in my part. But I did took it without hesitation even I am not sure what I am taking during those moments. But, now I can actually tell, it worked out well.

Like most people said sometimes, this is a matter of life and death. Like a sharp blade or wedge waiting to be drop and cut the rope that ties myself and my future.

I am currently in 4th year (but irregular) taking Bachelor of Science in Computer Engineering that time and the semester is about to end and unlike other students I know, I am in a real deep shit hole and I am just there staring up to everyone while thinking if I can find a way to climb and catch up with them. Pity me!

I just received my class card in my ECE 101 and it is apparent that I need to re-retake it again – Yeah, I failed it for the second time because I am a very irresponsible student, I really admit it. Fucking Dota fuck me good!

In that very moment, what I realized is that I can’t continue anymore or else…I don’t know what is going to happen with my life..probably worst than killing myself. Never tried to kill myself though, that’s just insane.

But in  a sudden turn of events, opportunity did knock big into me  – although that wasn’t what I am thinking by then.

I accidentally stumble into an outsourcing site called the Freelancer.com and it gave me a good pitch to try it out.

I am not really serious on what to do next after signing up on the site, but I don’t have anymore choice but to try all the possible options I can find. If it wouldn’t work out then I guess I won’t lose anything since I already lose everything. So, I just tried the things it says I need to.

After few days, a Filipina client sent me an offer to write for articles that will be submitted into a certain BMR (BuildMyRank) site.

Even though I am not confident with my English writing skills, I took the chance. Gladly, I was able to finished it and got paid for $35. However, I did it for almost 2 weeks so, if you come to think of it, its like I did it for nothing. But I moved on and took more projects from her.

After Freelancing.com, I tried to find more freelancing sites that is more generous in giving me opportunities to make money online.Gladly, I found Upwork.com (formerly oDesk.com). This site gave me a handful of opportunities until such time that already learning how to compete with other freelancers. So, when the next semester came I decided to tell my parents that I am not going to continue anymore.

Probably, to most people they would still prefer to continue, like the ‘try and try until you succeed’ mindset. But for me, I already have enough reasons not to follow that path and stop wasting time.

And so, even my parents didn’t gave me the support I want. I continue on establishing my freelancing career. Even the income was not that great and stable. I was still able to motivate myself and believed that I can thrive in this business and I promised to myself that I will do what it takes to survive and succeed.

..and I did survive. Succeed? Maybe I am halfway there. 😛

Starting as an online freelancer can bring you the worst and the best feelings in your life. If luck isn’t in your part, you’ll find clients who will give you projects and run away when the project’s done. In short, you’ll get scammed. That’s a guarantee for newbies. But of course, there are good times when you find very generous clients. It means, very easy projects with big pays (excluding the bonus if you impressed them). And this is also a guarantee for all freelancers.

In my 3 years and 11 months as an online freelancer. I was tried as an article/blog writer, web researcher, virtual assistant and other administrative-related jobs. Also web designs – which I really love to do (high pay + more fun).

As for my income – Well, I could say, its been stable in the last 2 years and more than enough to provide me a comfortable kind of living – a life that I didn’t saw when I was on that situation four years ago. Regarding my family, I finally got their support. Best feeling in mah fucking world!

I can’t complain to any of what I have and I can’t have. I may not be like one of those dropouts turn internet greats but at least, I have the satisfaction and dont have regrets in choosing this path.

And living in the virtual world in last four years actually taught me a thing or two about life.

A life-changing opportunity do knock only once. If your instinct tells you to grab it, grab it! Never hesitate to do what you know is best for you and believe in yourself that you can do it!

..and I did it!

What I Thinked When…

I couldn’t able to make a post yesterday since I forgot to follow The Commons and I surprisingly also miss to visit it. Gladly, I was able to remember just after my work – thank you to a ping back notification email in my gmail:) – and that makes me to write for today’s prompt. I just hope, it’s still right for me to continue this challenge despite that I miss one day.

 

A few days after Christmas and before new year when I decided to create this blog. Back then, I had a difficult time on deciding on what name my blog will be. Until I come up with this idea – My real full name is John Carl James, but I really don’t like it much and I prefer my nickname more, which is “Ivan” (as according to my father, it was from a Russian hero of which I didn’t bother to research and know the man). Now, because I really love this nickname I have, I tried to incorporate it to my potential blog name until I came across with “navI-gate”. It was like, for me, it will be Ivan’s Gate and I really find it very appropriate since the very first thing I want to write in my blog is the things I really kept hidden to the outside world – my secret thoughts, angst or grudges that I don’t have the courage to impart to whoever is involve on that hidden thought in my brainbox.

Going back on that “navi-gate” thing, I tried to make some visuals I can use. I even request a mock-up from a friend. Unfortunately, my brain’s deciding power is often complicated and I didn’t find myself to settle with anything those and just came up with “Navigate: Searching for existence”.

That subtitle of my blog is the one that should be my first title in this blog but it take too long for me to ignore and postpone on writing it and when I decided to write for it….Nothing!

It was blank!

But now, I really want to answer why I actually choose that subtitle for my blog rather than explaining what it is all about.

I know, it might be something funny for others. But believe me when I say, I only know minimal things in grammar. Actually, I sucked in my English subjects during college although I was exempted for one exam once for predicting correctly to my instructor’s thoughts.

This sucked-ness I have in this foreign language might gave me or help me to come out with these words.

Every time when I am writing for this blog. I am not actually sure if I am making sense with what I am saying or if I am actually expressing myself and all the things I want to say precisely. It’s like I am always searching for something that I can’t find, maybe even it was before my very eyes already. Getting my drift?

But then, I thought that this is just a personal blog, I am not writing to show off. I am not writing to let the world know that I am writing something here. After all, I am just writing to let my secret thoughts be let out because it gives me a huge relief each time I did it. So..if I get all these things wrong. I won’t lose anything, Am I?